If you have been waiting and waiting.. here's the rest of the Story of Emma. (In honor of their birthdays, which is just a week away..)
I left you off where I was being rolled out of the recovery room and through the waiting room to my waiting family (minus Emma). I was so amazed of the amount of people were there and how concerned they all were. I didn't get it.
My dear husband kept telling me how much he loved me and how he almost lost me and I kept thinking, 'what are you talking about?! I'm right here!' But the love.
So I was wheeled to the cardiac unit of the hospital since it was so serious which was on the third floor and the maternity floor was the second floor. So I didn't get to see Emma. I didn't get to be with her since she had to stay on that floor in the well baby nursery. And I didn't really get why I was so sick, or how sick I really was.
I was there overnight and shared a room with a really nice lady who was having some kind of test the next day. I told her how sorry I was that people kept coming in to check me. She probably wondered why I was there and where my baby was.
I didn't really know what had happened to me. I knew I had complications and lost a lot of blood, but I didn't really understand the surgery I just had. But my right side HURT. It hurt so badly when they would make me roll back and forth to check me. I didn't understand why.
I also was given my breast pump and the lovely lactation nurses came to visit me, which I was fine with. And I was pleasantly surprised by how supportive and non-pushy they were. One told me that I needed to help in order for my body to provide for my baby. That was the best thing I could of heard for how guilty I was feeling that I wasn't with my baby. I tried to pump but was busy interacting with all of the doctors and nurses that kept checking on me.
Finally, later that day or on Wednesday (Emma's scheduled c-section day) my doctor came and saw me and showed such concern for what had happened. He showed up right around the time that he should of been doing my c-section, delivering Emma. Would have things been the same?
Everything is such a blur. I just remember more pieces of this and that and just the feelings are what really speak out to me when I remember this delivery.
Finally, when I showed that my blood levels were getting better and my palates count was getting higher (after the four bags of blood), I was given one more bag of blood and I was transported to the post-pardum floor. Finally!!!! Funny thing, one of my co-workers came and visited me and was with me during the transport which included a huge boat thing that was put underneath me and then blown up like a huge raft. I was then transferred to the second floor and the raft was deflated. Interesting and quite fun!
Lots of my dear friends showed up and my parents too once all of the transporting of the bleeding, post-pardum mama..... and the nurse brought me my baby.
Oh do I remember that moment. I waited for that moment and I hope to never ever forget that moment. Mind you, I had only seen her right after she was born and then the next day for a brief moment before I was wheeled into the emergency uterine artery embolization surgery.
That little swaddled-up bundle of joy was placed into my arms. Oh her sweet little face. She started to fuss a little and I started to try and nurse her. I didn't really know what to do since with Ava she was in the NICU when I started to nurse her. So there were two nurses shoving my boobs into her mouth this way and that. And she was tiny and it didn't work well naturally and I had to use the assistance of a 'shield' (those are a BLAST!! Not.). So with Emma, we tried and it didn't really work without the nurses' and shield's help. But we got it and she was a champ. Even one of the lactation nurses commented about how I should go around and teach the other mommies how to do it. By having a baby that was away from me out of the womb for three days, she/we were doing great!
But I remember that sweet, sweet moment as if it felt like no one was in the room except for her and I. Her little scrunched face that looked like an Eskimo. And she was perfect. And she was healthy. And she was finally in my arms! And she made me a new mama again.
Throughout our stay together, we had many more visitors, including her daddy and her big sister. Oh my sweet Ava, she was so traumatized by the whole not-having-her-mommy-with-her. She wasn't eating. Her face was white. She wanted me. And I wanted her. I missed her so much and I was feeling all of the post-pardum emotions of what I just did to her and how her life was messed up. But it wasn't. She got the best gift on her birthday-- a new sister.
I remember when I saw Ava after having Emma with me. I just wanted her. I started to cry for how much I missed her. How upset she was. And all she wanted was me.... and some of my lunch from the hospital in which I obliged since I knew she wasn't eating.
The stay with Emma was magical. She was already on a three-hour eating schedule and my milk came in almost instantly and I pumped after nursing. The nights were quiet and I just starred at her. But I also enjoyed the nurses bringing me everything under the moon. It was lovely. I miss that. ;)
Having Emma on a Monday night, I was released on Friday. Too short of a stay for what the stay incurred. The doctor that did my c-section wanted me to stay until I was comfortable. My mom brought me home with Emma and it was great. And it was so different from when I brought Ava home from the NICU after her five-week stay. Especially since I had two babies. Really-- Ava was crawling around while I learned how to nurse Emma and build barriers out of Huggies boxes at the same time!
Little things like nursing Emma while feeding Ava breakfast seemed like the hardest task in the world! Ava turned one the week before, but it felt as if she was a two-year-old already! She was so jealous. She started hitting, biting, etc.
I would be jealous too! That was the hardest part. Having two babies under the age of two.
But look at them now! Couldn't live without each other and when it's a rare occasion, when it's just one of them without the other-- they are constantly asking and looking for their side-kick.
I love the bond my girls share at such a young age. With two under two, you have a free, built-in playmate, they share each other's clothes, you get two of everything, and you have dolls galore!