Tuesday, January 25, 2011

How one smell can trigger a memory

One scent-memory I have is very bizarre, but one that is my favorite. It's hand sanitizer. Hand sanitizer?!

Well, when I go to Kaiser to pick-up a prescription or to take one of the girls for a check-up, I always make sure I use their hand sanitizer. Who likes the smell of that stuff? Well, I do.

That smell instantly reminds me of Ava when she was a tiny baby. That one smell brings me back to a very scary time, but a sweet time in our lives. It's weird because once I smell that smell, feelings come over me and I start to cry because that scent reminds me of her. That's Ava's smell. It's her baby smell to me. It was the only connection I had to her at night when she wasn't home with us.

I always wonder if I should ask if I can buy a bottle of that stuff, or if I should secretly take one. But I think I need to save that smell-memory for it would not be the same as it is now if I was able to smell it whenever I wanted.

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